Posts tagged "fivefifteen"
WE ALL KNOW YOUR LIFE IS BETTER THAN MINE, OKAY?!

WE ALL KNOW YOUR LIFE IS BETTER THAN MINE, OKAY?!

I dedicate this reblog to my lovely friend, on a crusade to protect the public from expired Slim Jims.

I dedicate this reblog to my lovely friend, on a crusade to protect the public from expired Slim Jims.

(via wilwheaton)

too soon?

Kelly Clarkson came on and appears to have a piece of poop on her nail, which had already ruined my moment.

wilwheaton:

Butts.

Doing Charlie’s butt dance again.
It’s all for you, my favorite Lady Comedian, J.D..  All for you.

wilwheaton:

Butts.

Doing Charlie’s butt dance again.

It’s all for you, my favorite Lady Comedian, J.D..  All for you.

dailyoddcompliment:

“Textbook Fact”

Truthitude

dailyoddcompliment:

“Textbook Fact”

Truthitude

  • me: Ugh, can I please have Lena Dunham's life?
  • musicsaurusrex: Just murder her and take it.
  • musicsaurusrex: Then there will actually be a black person on her show.

We’re gonna occupy RuPaul’s Drag race until Kelly Osbourne is a permanent judge and Tim Gunn is a guest judge.

And not just Santino impersonating him.

why this question is hilarious is something only you can understand, lovely.

why this question is hilarious is something only you can understand, lovely.

better than smelling your neighbor’s bathroom in your kitchen

Which is what I assume my neighbor is experiencing.

Apologies!  Apologies all around!

I invented a new drink, it’s called “whiskey o’ clock” and it tastes delicious:

-  fill pint glass with cubed ice (fuck crushed ice, it’s complicated and it melts)

- Add a generous dollop of Grade A Maple Syrup (Thanks, beautiful)

- LOTS OF GEORGE DICKEL NO. 12 (if you are drinking Jack Daniels, tell it to go fuck itself and find a bottle of this)

- Top off with ginger ale

- Fresh lemon juice to taste

It is tasty, and best drunk on an empty stomach.  Like the one I have, because Friday wanted to make sure I knew it wasn’t quite the weekend just yet.

“i’m like totally riding the crimson wave”

I just saw this because I suck at life.  That is more an answer to “ways to make my boss throw up on me because he’s afraid of vaginas?”

To my favorite almost-California lawyer.

To my favorite almost-California lawyer.

I appreciate it. I stumbled upon something similar when I was doing work research a few months ago. Cannot be unseen.

The part of me that is morbidly curious is fascinated.  The rest of me is a sad panda.

I wanna seeeeeeeee. Or maybe I don’t.

Think long and hard.

I'm crafty. In every sense of the word.

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